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How Simplicity Elevates Your Quality Your Life
Lessons from a brilliant therapist
LA based therapist Lori Gottleib, in her fantastic book, Maybe You Should Talk To Someone, describes a beautiful rule of therapy:
“Without Memory or Desire”
Lori says that a good therapist does not attach ‘memory’ or ‘desire’ to their patient. They don’t let their past experiences affect their judgment / analysis of the current patient. And they don’t project their own ‘desires’ upon the patient.
To me, this rule should be applied to life to make it simple.
WITHOUT MEMORY:
You don’t let your past bitterness get in the way of your present relationships. You stop generalizing life. You don’t think that ‘all men are jerks’ or ‘all women are gold diggers’ or ‘love is a farce’ or ‘millennials are lazy’.
You welcome every person and opportunity as unique. You give everyone a fair chance and not simply act on automated bias.
WITHOUT DESIRE:
You don’t go around life wanting and desiring for things to happen your way. This Instead, you learn to accept the unpredictability of life.
You don’t force your wishes on others. You accept those who can’t change and you learn to discover joy in what you already have.
This is how simplicity changes your life.
It alters your perspective from negative to neutral. You view every change as a lesson or opportunity and when things don’t go your way (because they won’t), you remember to let go with grace.
