It’s amazing how so many of us do none of the things you mentioned in our everyday conversations. I am usually told that I’m a very good listener. And the only think that I can say that I do in a conversation is asking open ended questions.

“How was your meeting?”

“Enter angry rant”

“Uhuh.. And how did you feel about what they did?”

“More stuff — expression of negative emotions”

“Yes, I can see that you feel betrayed by the end of it.”

Even that helps people a lot. They often thank me for listening and understanding where they come from.

Giving advice is also a big irritant when someone’s venting. It makes them defensive and close-hearted, over time.

Brilliant article. Simple, yet startlingly illuminating.